Asking the right questions
It is 9AM. A mother, interpreter, and an
impossibly small boy follow
me to my office.
Did you have any
trouble getting here? I ask.
The mother tells me they took
three buses because nobody will
help her boy.
He is always sick. He is not talking.
She heard I would help him, so she came.
I tell her I can help his
listening, and his learning, and his talking.
I can help with his hitting, and throwing, and running away from her.
I can help with his hitting, and throwing, and running away from her.
She talks rapidly with
the interpreter who holds up a manicured finger,
giving me a silencing glance. I
wait.
The interpreter clears
her throat:
"She's wondering
if you can improve her son's immigration status."
I glance at the clock. It is 9:15.
****
The boy with long
eyelashes sits on the chair and taps the window.
Tap tap tap. Tap tap tap.
He laughs.
Does he ever do anything that hurts himself?
"He hits his head on the floor sometimes," his mother says.
Does he ever do anything that hurts himself?
"He hits his head on the floor sometimes," his mother says.
"But I don't
worry.
My best friend told me not to worry if he hits his head.
My best friend told me not to worry if he hits his head.
His head is soft so he can't
do any real damage yet."
There is a pause and
she says, softly,
"Sometimes I worry because he's almost 4 and
"Sometimes I worry because he's almost 4 and
that's when their heads
turn hard."
****
We who do this work
talk in short-hand questions to one another -
Making it? Ready? Okay? Need help?
Making it? Ready? Okay? Need help?
I hear my colleague on
the phone:
"But do you have enough food to get through the weekend?"
"But do you have enough food to get through the weekend?"
Later, I poke my head
in.
You eat?
You eat?
*****
It's 11:30.
"My creative writing teacher is the best teacher ever.
"My creative writing teacher is the best teacher ever.
I think she's the best person I've ever met."
What makes her the best person you've ever met?
"She likes my writing.
Like, she really actually likes it because she thinks it's good.
She isn't just saying it's good because I have autism.
That's not very
usual."
*****
It's 1:30pm and my
office has so many people in it
we are all sweating.
Mom sorts through a
plastic grocery bag of records, receipts
prescriptions, Mountain
Dew, and cheese curls.
She hands me an MRI
report, an IEP, and an inhaler as the baby in the stroller screams.
"This one,"
she says, rolling her eyes. "He'll
come see you next."
I explain the paperwork, hand Mom a pen and
she grabs it with her whole fist.
There is fear in her
eyes.
Would you like me to read it to you?
I point to the line
where it says signature.
She carefully prints
each letter.
*****
How does she tell you what she wants or needs?
"Well, she's starting to
talk,
but she only knows English words.
but she only knows English words.
No Arabic words.
So she's finally talking but
I still don't know what she wants.
She's only in
Kindergarten
but I can't help her with her homework.
I told her teacher I was trying to help
but she just stopped sending the homework home."
*****
It's 5:30.
I close the door and stare out the window at the playground, watching
I close the door and stare out the window at the playground, watching
the flow of children running, falling,
climbing, crying as
the steady line of people trudge across the muddy spring grass to the rest of their lives
I didn't even know to ask about
big hands holding tight
the small ones
mouths forming words not meant for me.
Unanswered questions like prayers burn upon my lips as
Unanswered questions like prayers burn upon my lips as
I pack my bag and walk through
the eerily quiet lobby.
"Dr. L," says
the security guard with a nod.
"We'll see you
tomorrow?"
Yes sir, I say.
Bright and early.
"A'ight
then," he says, seriously.
"We're counting on
it. You hear?"
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